“Where do you think you’re going? Nobody’s leaving. Nobody’s walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We’re all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We’re gonna press on, and we’re gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he’s gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse.”
–Clark Griswold, Christmas Vacation-
Watching Christmas Vacation in this house pretty much signifies that the holiday season is in full swing.
I set out big pot of white bean and spinach soup, maple cinnamon popcorn, and a couple cherry and pomegranate martinis.
Then we slurped, crunched, and sipped our way through all the Griswold shenanigans.
In a perfect Christmas world, I would have a cup of old-fashioned egg nog sloshing around a Marty the Moose glass in one hand, and a big old piece of rich chocolate fudge in the other hand.
Since raw eggs aren’t my thang, I’ve developed quite an affection for Silk Nog.
It’s especially delicious in hot mug of coffee when you can’t get your hands on Marty the Moose.
And you know what makes that hot cup of nog coffee even better?
TWO INGREDIENT VEGAN FUDGE.
It’s a Christmas Miracle!
It’s a Wonderful Life!
It’s the hap, hap, happiest Christmas discovery since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye.
There are no weird or unusual ingredients in this recipe, which is annoyingly common in vegan fare.
Sorry my small town Food Lion just ran out of their last jar.
Usually it’s next to the Kale chips and Spirulina powder but that $20.00 jar of coconut butter seems to be flying off the shelves.
No worries, the only two things you need for classic, no fuss fudge is chocolate frosting and chocolate chips.
In all honesty, I skipped the plastic container of frosting, even though it is often curiously vegan, and made a batch of my own.
I used the recipe found in Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World, but your favorite frosting recipe should work.
I also use Ghiradhelli semi-sweet chocolate chips because they are non-dairy and delicious.
If you’re so inclined, you could use any combination of frosting and chips.
White Chocolate Cinnamon?
The possibilities are endless.
VEGAN CHOCOLATE FUDGE
1 cup of chocolate chips
1 cup of chocolate frosting
Melt chocolate chips over a double boiler or simply microwave in 30 second increments, stirring after each round.
Stir together melted chocolate chips and frosting until smooth.
Spread evenly into 9 x 5 loaf pan, heavily greased or lined with tinfoil
Refrigerate until firm.
Vegan Chocolate Fudge?
Hallelujah! Holy Shit!
Where’s the Tylenol?