Spinning My Wheels

You know who shows up to bike races?

People who are really good at bike races.

And then there’s me.

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Peddling faster than I’ve ever peddled in my life and still coming in at the back of the pack.

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It was my first race.

My only goal was to finish all 25 miles.

And pedal continuously.

My strategy was just to ride comfortably and enjoy the journey.

That lasted three seconds.

When I saw the other women in my age group take off at break- neck speed, I wanted to follow them.

They were out of sight in another three seconds.

My next plan was to just hope and pray that I could “out endurance” them.

You know, hopefully they would get tired in the middle of the race and I would sort of just ride on by.

I never saw them again.

At mile 15 my i-pod quit working.

Which is fitting since  cyclists don’t seem to use any sort of technology.

Other than the 3000 dollars of it outfitted on their bikes.

Even still, I felt pretty damn good when I sailed through the finish line.

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I enjoyed a post race beer and the conversations happening all around me.

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That wind at Todd’s Mill was the worst!

Brian wiped out at a traffic cone. He’s at the ambulance.

At one point I had to slow down to 21 mph!

I kept trying to draft but couldn’t catch up to anybody!

Draft?

Huh?
The only draft I know is of the beer variety.

I was clearly out of my element.

But it was fun.

I will learn.

And I will be back.

Now we all know the best part of a race is the carb loading that takes place before hand.

Most people load up on pasta and starchy veggies, but all I wanted was cereal.

The sugary kind.

With no nutritional value other than manufactured supplemental crap.

I spent a week grabbing handfuls of the hubby’s secret cereal stock.

And then I found this.

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Ugh.

He is going to be so cranky when he finds out all his Honey Bunchies of Oaties is gone.

And I didn’t buy any more cereal this week.

Besides this.

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Which I ate in two days.

Shut it.

I was in training.

It’s cool, though.

There’s a reserve box of corn flakes chilling out in the pantry.

From when I was pretending that non-sugary cereal tasted good.

It doesn’t.

But I can make it taste good.

HONEY BUNCHES OF O-SHIT THIS STUFF IS GOOD!

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8 cups corn flake cereal

1/2 cup quick cooking oats

1/2 cup chopped almonds

1/4 cup honey

1 teaspoon canola oil

1/4 teaspoon cinnamon

Pre-heat oven to 325 degrees.

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Pour honey and canola oil in a microwave safe container and microwave for 30 seconds (or just warm it on the stove).

Add cereal to a very large bowl.

Pour half of the honey mixture over the cereal and stir, making sure to coat as much of the cereal as possible.

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Add oats, almonds, and cinnamon and mix thoroughly.

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Add the rest of the honey and mix once more.

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Pour cereal onto foil lined baking sheets and bake for 5-7 minutes.

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Recipe note: Despite my complicated mixing process, this actually makes better “bunches” if you mix all the dry ingredients and then drizzle the honey over the whole batch and then stir. I guess simplicity is best!

Remove from oven and allow to cool.

Cereal will crisp up once cooled.

Try not to eat half of the batch while scooping it into an airtight container.

Or just eat it.

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And tell your husband to buy his own damn cereal.

KEEP CALM AND PEDAL ON!

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